Friday, December 19, 2008

Dancing with Lady Luck, Snowy Tundra, and the Persistent Malfunction

Oh my, did that sound like three whole blog posts in one entry? Good God, how does one accomplish such a task? With editors, that's how. Unfortunately due to the current economic shaboozle, I've had to fire mine though, so the following discombobulative drivel is coming directly from the horse's mouth. I do intend to explain the stories behind the antecedent titles respectively, and then weave them together in a single ingenious narrative myself however - thus proving that not all blogs need four fictional editors.

So firstly, I've been ... well - rather unlucky lately. It began in mid-November when I badly injured my leg in what was meant to be an experimental leap into a new 'exercise regimen'. My mobility hampered (to say the least), I gave it a good two weeks to heal, and naturally after that period and once I was able to walk on it again, I leapt over a fence one evening and injured it in the same place. At that juncture I then decided to persue other distractions until I could shoot for round three. 'Try, try again' I suppose. (Learning from mistakes? Bollocks!)

Early December rolled around and I was just about ready to leap back into the world of ... fence-leaping, when I caught the flu from who knows where and became bed-ridden for a week. Actually, I would have been bed-ridden if I hadn't had a job to attend. Hence the bug took another week to start fading, which brings me to today, where I sit, throat sore and typing with a blanket over my shoulders.

In retrospect, it's probably a good thing I was sick for the weekend after all. Lady Luck and I were like, totally not getting on at this point - but I felt she had another villainous card up her hooker-like sleeve.

You see, I had been invited to Whistler by some friends, but cancelled on them because I'd already RSVP'd to two parties happening the Saturday night. Call me mad, (or Susan, if you must), but I don't play around with engagements! I was kinda bummed though, because the new Peak to Peak gondola had just opened up between Whistler and Blackcomb, and we were all itching to try it out.

Well, despite abandoning the trip, the aforementioned ailment forced me to stay in bed, so I missed both the parties anyway. 'Unfortunate!' you may think, but prepare to be slowly and awkwardly schooled otherwise!

On the Saturday evening, I happened to look out my window at 3:22am (as my sleeping patterns lately have been persistently and completely screwed. Read: Insomnia; Restless; Cha Cha [ -see me after class Mr. Wilson ]) and was dazzled by the sight of almost a foot of snow, covering everything outside in a smooth ivory icing.

With it coming down harder than a shitzu on E, I stayed indoors, rugged up, and on Monday afternoon texted my friends in the snowfields to see what adventures I'd missed. Apparently both a mis-adventure, and a real adventure. The mis-adventure a result of no snow on the mountains - at least, not enough to properly enjoy the runs with - and the proper adventure from one of the big gondola supports snapping in half, and stranding people mid-journey.

Now, it wasn't the Peak to Peak, as originally and dramatically reported by many news sources (oh sensationalist journalism; my old foe). It was in fact another lift on Blackcomb, one that, had we been present, and had snow actually fallen on the mountain, we could possibly maybe have been on. But I knew what this meant. The lack of snow, (INCRIMINATING ITEM #2), broken ski-lift -

- Lady Luck had struck again.

With the realisation that I had to promptly segue into a dramatic finale, and certain I was onto a conspiracy, I hired an animated goon to knock Luck off, and stole her magic... cards or whatever. I subsequently burned them in my faux-wood fireplace - and a there was much rejoicing. Her evil reign had finally come to it's abrupt and somewhat unwarranted end!

That, then, is my story (or three stories) and I hope more than enough information to explain my absence from my vigil over this literary land.

So, I'll finish this post here, but before I run off, I'd like to extend a sincere thanks to all my readers this year, both lurkers and commenters alike. Have a Merry Christmas, happy holiday season, and a prosperous and safe new year all!

Jimzip :D

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